Information on romance scams and scammers.
by nearlymuggedoff Thu Jan 06, 2011 7:44 pm
Hello there!

Thankfully, due to a suspicious friend and this site, I have been able to suss out that I was being scammed by a fake US soldier. I didnt part with any money but I am pretty worried that I gave out my personal info, like name, address, phone number and my mothers maiden name.

Is there anything I can do to protect myself? I'm feeling kinda vulnerable as the scammer knew I was away on holiday and now knows where I live :( Is it worth reporting it to the police? I live in the UK.

Many thanks for this site. It's clear as day now I think of the bad English grammer the guy used in chat/email......arghhh! feel so stooooopid!! :shock:

All the best :)
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by GomerPyle Thu Jan 06, 2011 9:08 pm
If you hadn't given your mother's maiden name then you'd probably have no need to worry. It's doubtful he intends to use it but that piece of information is one thing that could enable him to give instructions to your bank, via an accomplice, that would give him access to your funds. The best thing would be to contact your bank so that you can take their advice on the action to take, which should cover any cards you have too.

It's unlikely he'd use it, but the mere fact he asked for that information means you shouldn't take the risk. Some scammers specifically target accounts to try and ring to get access, but they usually get bank contact numbers at the same time, as they must know how difficult it is to contact banks by phone nowadays.

No one on this site knows my real name, and it's not that I don't trust them. It's a matter of online survival and anyone asking intrusive questions about things they have no need to know, must be a major red flag.

Non-EU citizens should go here to find out about obtaining a visa to work as an au pair in the UK
http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/en/doineedvisa/
Whenever payment is requested by Western Union you're dealing with a scammer
by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 8:06 am
Ahhh, ok, thanks for that. Alhough I dont use my Mum's maiden name as security, so dont feel too threatened. But they do also have my DOB! So will call my bank in a moment and take instruction.

I was also wondering if there is any way to find the person who's pictures they have stolen? I feel sorry for that guy.

Also, I'd like to make the scam more public. Is there any way of doing that? I'm going to inform the dating site I was on. Anything else I can do to make women aware?? I dont think I'm a mug when it comes to men and dating sites. This guy was very clever. I was speaking to him for over 3 months and he wasn't over the top at all. You know? Like he wasn't obviously declaring his love for me or telling me I was beautiful or such giveaways. He was very subtle. But hey, I guess I should have known that the US army wouldnt make their soldiers work for 9months without a breeak........lol

Stupid now when I think of it, but like I say, it was subtle. He more used the angle that HE didnt trust dating sites, that were lots of liars out there etc..........very clever psycholigical games they play......hmmm!!

Thanks for your help, I appreciated it immensely.

:beer:
by GomerPyle Fri Jan 07, 2011 8:28 am
Yes nearlymuggedoff, they range from utter meat heads to the ultra sophisticated and most are very cunning with a clear focus of what brings them a payday. The fact that your scammer waited so long marks him out as the 'high end' model and don't be in any doubt how effective they can be. A UK woman got taken for a six figure sum a few months ago and they won't hesitate to use blackmail or any means to extract money from you.

You're not in any personal danger from a scammer even if he has your personal details as they are all cowardly and not likely to take the risk of wanting to see you in real life. They know that the anonymity of the internet makes them virtually impossible to track and won't dare to take any personal risk.

The person whose photos they have used can't do anything about it and it doesn't serve any purpose contacting them.

The same way we have signature lines below our posts, perhaps more people should have something like "If you want money - use a cash machine, 'cause I don't pay for sweet talk" on theirs when they use dating sites. Something amusing, but with a clear message to would be scammers.

Non-EU citizens should go here to find out about obtaining a visa to work as an au pair in the UK
http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/en/doineedvisa/
Whenever payment is requested by Western Union you're dealing with a scammer
by Michelle Fri Jan 07, 2011 8:32 am
Hello and welcome to Scamwarners.com nearlymuggedoff

You can make this more public by posting the scammers details right here so that others can find him during an internet search.

Please feel free to post his e-mails - ensure that his e-mail address is visible but remove your own before summiting.
by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:16 am
OMG!!! A six figure sum??? It makes me want to cry the way they target and 'groom' vulnerable women (and men) that are just looking for a bit of love and companionship......Jeez!! What a disgrace to the human race!!

I guess they can use my pictures now too...crikey, and I dont even post my pic on facebook..!!

Thanks for your signature idea, I'll use that :=)

@ Michelle - shall I post emails, pictures, documents here in this post? Or is there a dedicated forum for just those details?

Thank you so much :beer:
by Michelle Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:21 am
^^^^^

You can carry on here for the time being - eventually I'll move the whole topic to the appropriate Romance Scam section.
by GomerPyle Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:37 am
I tracked down the news story in case you thought I was just making it up. You probably didn't, but some of the real life cases are by nature hard to believe.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/ghana/7664254/Police-arrest-suspected-romance-fraudster-who-posed-as-US-soldier.html

I actually under-exagerrated the amount involved, and the fact they arrested someone is very rare.

This might be impressive due to the amount involved, but the cases where a scammer is taking food money from a victim are worse, and scammers will do that without a second thought. Once someone starts paying, it can become a dangerous compulsion, so there's nothing better than to hear that someone hasn't fallen victim.

Non-EU citizens should go here to find out about obtaining a visa to work as an au pair in the UK
http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/en/doineedvisa/
Whenever payment is requested by Western Union you're dealing with a scammer
by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 10:13 am
ok Michelle, will gather all the relevant info and post it here.

@Gomer - Wow!!! Thanks for that news article. I'm going to send it round in an email to all my friends.

As much as I think I'm no mug when it comes to money (I get irked if a guy doesn't buy the first drink on a date!!! lol Not that I am tight, I always pay my way, but I just think you can tell a lot about a guy who doesnt offer a drink to a lady they first meet!!), and it was at that point when I really got suspicious (I did think his English was weird and the fact that he couldnt apply for his own leave a bit harsh, but like I say, the guy subtly convinced me that this was just American slang and army politics).

There certainly was a compulsion to help this guy. And I probably would have done anything APART from send cash! He had me believing that the US army protocol and security was so tight that he couldn't have any money or phones or contact with the outside world. He said that he 'stole' time to be with me online....lol....laughing now, but I was really feeling sorry for him!!

Anyway, will post all the details.............

All the best and thank you again for this site :)
by Arnold Fri Jan 07, 2011 10:41 am
nearlymuggedoff wrote:As much as I think I'm no mug when it comes to money

Nobody here thinks that you are. These scammers are very good at what they do, very convincing.

by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 11:28 am
Ok, here is an overview of the last 3 months chatting to a fake US soldier named:

Staff Sergeant John Donald - serving in Musa Qula, Afghanistan. Resident in Palm Beach, Florida, USA

He has a facebook profile called Donald John

I'm assuming he just uses his surname first as the military would do so? He signs off his emails as John, not Donald. Although, this wasnt quite clear in the beginning as I was calling him Donald on chat and he didnt seem to pull me up on it?

His email address is:

[email protected]

The picture on the dating site where he first contacted me, which was be2 is this one:

Image


and when I made contact in return he told me he had a daughter called Zoe, who was in boarding school in the USA and sent me a picture (to prove that info, I suppose?):


Image
Last edited by nearlymuggedoff on Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.
by Katharina Fri Jan 07, 2011 11:50 am
Hi and Welcome!
First of all, you are Not stupid. You didn't Know about this Type of scam. And you Found out - congratulations!
For the pics: You could use a free photohosting Account, e.g. Photobucket, to get a URL.
Sorry about the spelling - my iPad insists on correcting me.
by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:21 pm
Thanks for the support Katherina :D Will try posting the images now.........
by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:37 pm
This was his first email to me after chatting on MSN live for the first time when I pointed out to him that I was never going to leave the UK to live in America. The title of this email was I appreciate you which, thinking about it, I found a bit strange too...lol ..what man says that after a chat!!?? :

Hi,

How is your day going? Just thought I'd write you a short note to tell you how much I enjoyed meeting you on the site and conversation with you on IM. I can't recall when I had a more pleasant time. Everything felt so natural, and you were very easy to talk to. It's hard for me to identify what it is about you that attracts me so. I suppose it might be the combination of your lol, your good-looks you sent to my mail, which am going to make screen saver, Your inner beauty and what you want out of life. Whatever it is, I can sense its presence. You could call it chemistry, or better yet, the possibility that we are on the same wavelength.
Anna, I really hope that our first encounter was not our last because I felt very special when I was with you. I truly want to give this a chance to grow more and higher to something more than friendship. Cant wait to chat with you again.

Enjoy the rest of your day,
John.



along with another pic:


Image
by nearlymuggedoff Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:53 pm
So, after that, things continued on a friendly basis. We would chat on IM and have a laugh about things. I didnt find him intrusive or over the top in his desires. Not sexual or harassing. We just spoke about music and swimming and his daughter and things he missed from home etc. And of course how he'd love to find a family again for himself when he 'retired'. But when I said things like I wouldn't trust anyone until I met them, he would say he understood that and that it was cool and that I should follow my instincts...........

Then, there was a turning point in MY circumstances. I was due to go on holiday for xmas and new year and the first week was on my own. On chat one night it was me that said to him that it would be great for him to meet me there!!!!! I guess this was the opening he was waiting for...........

so, I went on holiday, had WIFI in my accomodation and he was appearing online a lot more often!!! He then said to me the he would love to be there with me and that he would love to leave the desert. But in order to leave the desert, I had to apply for leave on his behalf! I did find this strange, and voiced that. But he just said that it was how the US army did things. That the politics were hard to live with. etc etc.

And all along he's feeding me info about his friends in the army with him. About his missions. About how the taliban are attacking etc etc. Here is an example of another email:

Hey ****, i think i really miss talking with you every night, even we are still pushing hard on the insurgent from the North, yet, my mind couldn't get off you, i hope you are doing good, am very fine here. Wish you were here with me(laughing). I won't be coming here online for the remaining days here in Musa Qala, before heading back West. i hope i talk with you soon. I miss the endurance class with you. did you go shopping again today?
i miss you
John.



By the 'endurance class' he means he would joke about how long we would spend online chatting and compare it to a soldiers endurance training and that I was in training now too.

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