Information on romance scams and scammers.
by SadGirl69 Fri Dec 20, 2013 3:29 am
Hi all. I am having a difficult time getting over someone who is almost certainly a scammer. I unfortunately did not keep copies of his e-mails/photos to be able to add to my post. The only picture is on WhatsApp under his old phone number and maybe one of you knows a way to pull that up.

He contacted me on BBW Cupid and I said that I did not think it was a good idea to talk to someone several states away but maybe he could convince me. He did! He wrote a very well-written (no African errors, etc) and seemingly heartfelt introductory e-mail to me. (I did Google search the letter to see if it was "cut and paste" from somewhere else and it was not). He said that his name was Matthew Middleton and had e-mail address of [email protected]. He said he lived in Columbus, OH and did have a phone number w/ that area code. We chatted and spoke on the phone on and off between April and July of this year. Then he left for business trip to Malaysia (oil rig security programs). Then no contact for a month. Then contacted w/ story of having personal and business cell stolen along with wallet. Asked for $500 or $1000, whatever I could spare, for help in getting home. I refused, he berated me for not helping. Then no contact. Then a month passed and he contacted me again to say that he regretted how things had turned out between us.

I feel like such a fool for falling for this guy so hard and for not being able to "snap out of it." Please, please be careful in the world of online dating. I am out of it now-- will try to go to more Meet Up activity groups in my area and expand my social horizons that way, but no more talking to out of town folks on the computer or texts.
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by tinker Fri Dec 20, 2013 7:34 am
Hi SadGirl,

One of the staff should be along shortly, but I wanted to say I am sorry you ran into one of these scum. They do more than steal money:they damage your self-respect and your ability to trust. I am glad that you didn't lose money to him. I would suggest you block his email and phone-refuse all contact.
by jolly_roger Fri Dec 20, 2013 8:48 am
Hi SadGirl69. The scammers can be very convincing with their storylines. Do not beat yourself up too much. You must refrain from thinking yourself as foolish. How long it takes you to snap out of it depends upon your resolve. When I was scammed, it took several months to recover. But everyone is different, it may take days or weeks for you to move on properly. It sounds like you have lost no money to the trickster which is a positive aspect. You will need to be wary of other scammers (or members of the same syndicate) writing in the coming days/ weeks. Sometimes they will pass someone's e-mail address to other scammers but if you're careful in the short term, they will stop pestering you.
by Smith Jones Fri Dec 20, 2013 4:03 pm
Oh sadgirl69, I'm so glad you came here to scamwarners. I also was on BBWCupid and you know what, my scammer ended up going to Malaysia on business and got things stolen from him and eventually needed help. I understand how you feel and I know what it's like to go through the pain of realizing this person you opened your heart to is really a scamming liar.
I hope you are no longer in contact with him. You really must stop and it is hard. Especially because he came back to you. Please understand they circle back if they think you are still connected to them and if there is a chance you will sympathize and send some money. It is big with the holidays looming and they want to buy presents and play on your emotions.
It takes some time to recover so go gently with yourself. I felt sad, lonely, mad, and even like the fool you said. It is natural. Be happy if you didn't send money, as I was extra foolish and did that. Give yourself time to heal and understand the reason you came here is you wised up and knew something was wrong. It is hard to get used to not chatting, or emailing, or communicating with someone who treated you like the most special person ever, and to deal with knowing the person lied and you will not hear those words again.
If I can be of any help, please let me know.

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